Dear Maggie Gallant

Dear Maggie Gallant of Spotlight Communications, I recently came across your name while idly googling my own. I do it from time to time, just to see if there’s any new Maggie Gallant’s, because we’re not terribly common are we. We only merit 5 pages of entries on Google. Anyway, I’m just writing to congratulate you on your achievements as Maggie Gallant and to keep you up-to-date with my own.I’m guessing that you don’t Google our name very often. If you did, you’d see me straight away because I’m the top entry, though given my domain name – erikn10.sg-host.com – it probably isn’t all that surprising. You may be thinking that this is silly, or creepy and that we have nothing in common except our name, but you’d be wrong.Your first entry on Google reads ..Maggie Gallant, who opened her own publicity firm in New York at age 22 … Isn’t it a little ironic that given that you’re a publicist, the first mention of you is on page 2 of Google. Just wondering. The thing is, I also worked in publicity. Well actually it was public relations but apparently no-one calls it PR anymore because it degrades what we do. As if that were possible. Fair enough, it wasn’t my own business and it was in London not New York and at 22 I was still in college having fucked around with my life for 2 years after leaving school. But even so, can’t you just feel the goosebumps? Maybe you’re not convinced, so here’s the next thing. I also started my own business! Yes, I know. Go to page 3 of Google and there I am, 2 Bad Mice Design, which I set up with my husband Erik, or rather which he set up with his wife Maggie. Sheer coincidence? I don’t think so. And being media types, we are of course both quoted in snappy soundbites.Here’s you: “It’s like the new Madison Avenue,” says trend and celebrity expert Maggie Gallant.Here’s me: Maggie Gallant , a spokeswoman for AOL Europe said the company is currently taking steps to lobby government and regulators in the UK.Will this synchronicity never cease? Do you use the word synchronicity very much? Me neither. But get this – in one entry you said a company had to get its ducks in a row. Unbelievable. I won clients on the basis of that phrase.Here?s the entry I really love though. The snippet on Google says: Publicist Maggie Gallant says SARS isn’t her biggest fear. I thought for a few minutes and realized it wasn?t mine either. So I read on.“Here’s what I’m afraid of, and it happens to me all the time…It never fails: When I’m looking like shit , I run into people all the time. It happened to me today; I’m yelling no way, trend and celebrity expert Maggie Gallant, no damn way. As a comic, I sometimes get people coming up to me when I’m out to say they saw me at a show. And yes, I look like shit. Then you said, “I got busted in Victoria’s Secret. Ugly trashy lingerie, and I ran into someone I hadn’t seen in five years! It was very upsetting.” Ok, this hasn’t happened to me. I prefer their little shorty sleepy shorts, though I was once seen feeling the fabric of a pair of their scary tummy tuck knickers. But you’re pretty funny, you could be on stage and then there could be 2 Maggie Gallant female comics and we’d be sisters ruling the comedy universe.Well I hope this has given you a little insight into my life, it’s been great to catch up after so many years. Keep upholding the good name and if you marry, make sure you keep hold of Gallant. Oh god, you?re not married are you, tell me this isn’t your married name? In fact don’t tell me, I couldn?t stand to know the truth. And don’t worry too much about not being first on the Google entry page, it’s not that big a deal. In fact, take pride in the fact that you’re the very last entry on the last page. You get the final word. Though of course I did have 3 entries on that page compared to your 1 but what does that really matter.All the best,Your namesake, but so much moreMaggie Gallant